It has been a tiring but very good week. Niko was a great experience. While a key part of the program is not knowing what will come next, and for that reason they request that we not give too much specific information about what the program consists of, I can broadly say that we did lots of hiking to unknown locations at unexpected times to do unknown challenges. We were assigned to a team of about five people, and must complete all of the challenges together, so one of the biggest challenges is figuring out how to work together and support those who are having a harder time. I will admit that at the beginning, my attitude was not great. I was not looking forward to three days of sleeping out in the cold after three weeks of being sick. I was on the last team, I was the only guy, and we had several very strong personalities. Still, as we started the challenge, it was really cool to see how everyone came together and supported each other to finish, even when they thought we couldn’t. Physically, I think that the exercise was something that my body had long been needing. Additionally, there is something very satisfying about carrying everything that we will need on our back and sleeping out in the open. I don’t remember the last time I saw that many stars. Finally, it was a powerful time spiritually. By getting pushed to my limits physically, I learned more of what it means to rely on God. I came back on Friday exhausted, but feeling very refreshed at the same time.

Thank you everyone for your prayers. Last night we had a meeting. We are supposed to leave in a week and a half. However, group finances are still about half of what they need to be, and about four or five students still have almost no support in. Ivan and another girl named Chelsea (from the British Virgin Islands) are still missing passports. What’s more, we just found out that all of the applications for Indian visas by non-US citizens had been rejected, so at this point, there are only about seven people on our team (including staff) who would be able to go to India. People are feeling discouraged. While last-minute breakthroughs are part of the YWAM experience, our DTS director said that he had never had a situation quite like ours before.

However, oddly enough, I feel really excited. My whole life I’ve said that I want to live a life of faith. I told God before coming here that I wanted to be a part of a story that was bigger than I could write, that I wanted to live a life radical dependence (as Christianese as I know that sounds). One of my favorite stories when I was younger was of a missionary named George Muller, who established an orphanage in Bristol, England in the 1820s. In addition to helping orphans, he also wanted to be living demonstration that God provides for those who trust him. As such, he refused any regular donations or fundraising, living day to day on what was provided. One morning, there was no breakfast. The boys gathered in the dining room, and were concerned with the lack of food before them. George Muller invited them to pray: “Lord, we thank you for the food that you are going to provide for us this morning.” Moments later, there was a knock on the door. A bread truck had crashed in front of the orphanage, and the owner was wondering if the orphanage was in need of bread, as he couldn’t get it to market.

For me, coming here has been a grand experiment to see what happened if I were to take God at his word and seek after him: if George Muller stories actually happened. The process of getting to this point has been very difficult as the things which I use to keep control have been stripped away. We are now to the point that we can literally do nothing else. So, for me at least, this next week will be a pivotal point for me in understanding  what listening to God means and what grace means.  The way I figure, there are three possibilities. Possibility one: last minute, everything comes through, and everyone goes to India. This would be nothing short of a miracle. Several miracles, actually. Moral of the story: in spite of human irresponsibility, lack of planning, and negligent administration, God comes through, and will not let those he has called be stopped by anything if they are willing to trust him. Possibility two: India is not an option, at least for everyone. Doors open for some to remain in Mexico and do an alternative outreach. Moral of the story: human irresponsibility and lack of planning has consequences, and God will let those consequences take place. However, like the story of Joseph, God is capable of redeeming any situation and making good come out of it. Possibility three: doors stay closed. Outreach doesn’t happen. Moral of the story: heaven helps those who help themselves.

Please keep these in your prayers. As I have been praying about this situation, the story that keeps coming to mind is that of Gideon in the book of Judges: God steadily strips away his natural resources, reducing him to an army of 300 men to face an army of 100,000 and emerging triumphant. Whether this is from God or wishful thinking will be largely determined by what happens or doesn’t happen over this next week.  Based on what I’ve seen from God, I am confident that a bread truck will come, though I don’t know what it will look like or what that will mean.